Another Witchy’s story!!
 

Listen to Witchy's story!

"This is the description of my teacher’ s life:

  • Preparing potions for Magic Arts classes
  • inventing new potion recipes for students’ homework and tests
  • consulting tarots to understand their inner feelings and goals
  • asking the crystal ball what the hell they have got inside their minds when they look demotivated and sad
  • and, last but not the least, the ministry has ordered me to give them broomstick flying lessons so that they can take a broomstick driving license if they are under 18 years of age.

    Are you still surprised if I say that I feel all the symptoms of the teachers’ burnout syndrome? I guess you very often feel the same…

The truth is that teachers today are expected to fulfill so many roles, and the least important of them actually seems to be teaching! If they let us do only our teaching job perhaps we would feel better but they don’t. We must be not only teachers but also computer experts, psychologists, film directors, entertainers, etc. etc. the list of our skills is long.

These were just my thoughts when I happened to look out of the window and get a glimpse of the Farmer walking down the lane with Pompeus. Did I forget to tell you about Pompeus? Yes!? Well, he’s the Physical Education teacher of the Magic Forest School and also my favourite colleague because he is always positive, energetic and healthy. In other words he looks very handsome and macho. I made myself almost invisible to overhear their *vaguely Shakespearian* conversation".

Farmer: “Dear Pompeus, how can you be in such a good shape? I feel a pain in my back, my hair is thinning… well… hairs have started a sort of back count… 15… 14… 13… and, also, I look very pale. What is the secret of your splendid form?”

Pompeus: “I do a lot of… ahemmmm… physical exercise… YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

Farmer: “Alas, my good Pompeus! I’m too stressed even for THAT… I’ve lost all my stamina. I think the tension involving in running the Magic Forest School is too much for me!”

Pompeus: “Don’t say that! You need a bit of my secret sorcery. Come to my cottage at a quarter to midnight!”

Farmer: “Promised!”

 
"Could a witch not hide herself under Pompeus’s cottage window sill to find out what sort of black magic they were going to conjure up? Of course not! So at a quarter to midnight I was kneeling under Pompeus’s cottage window sill. The trouble is that I suffer from dust allergy (also this one is a symptom of stress) and, being Pompeus a bachelor, on his window sill there were not only thick layers of dust but also spider webs and cockroaches. In other words, the house looked filthy even from outside but this was not the problem since my stomach is strong; the problem was that very soon, because of allergy, I felt an irresistible need of sneezing.

Eeeetchuuummmm!!

 

My sneezes are famous all over the Magic Forest; the Farmer has reckoned that the air travels out of my lungs at the speed of 345 km/hour! It was so that my presence did not remain undiscovered…"

Farmer: “I knew that silly Hazel was somewhere watching what we’re doing! Come in Witchy! Don’t worry! We’re up to nothing which can’t be seen… and what Pompeus does may be useful also for you because recently you’ve looked a bit burnout too”.

"A lady can’t refuse such a courteous invitation so I entered and saw Pompeus performing an acrobatic exercise with his left hand touching his right ankle right below his neck while his back outlined an elegant arch. Then he did the same backbreaking movement with the opposite hand and ankle".

 

Hazel: “If I do the same I will die! And I challenge all the actors of the CSI series to guess why I committed suicide in such a psychotic perverse way!”

Pompeus: “It’s not important to do this exercise the way I do it myself. Brain Gym movements are very simple and can be done by everybody at any age, even at yours!”

Hazel: “Thank you but I’m only one-hundred-fifty-three years old and thanks to my magic charms I have preserved all my juvenile features. If it weren’t for this terrible pain in my back… “

Pompeus: “Ok! Look at what I do and do the same to relieve the stress deriving from our highly risky and debilitating work”.

 
Dear Magic Forest villagers! These are the photos of myself while doing some of the most popular and effective 26 movements which compose Brain Gym. Who said BG is only for students? It can be useful for all people especially us teachers. After showing you the exercises I will give you some more tips about how to manage stress effectively.

 
 

Lazy eight's

  • Start at the midpoint of an imaginary figure eight at eye level
  • start with your left hand
  • keep your arm straight
  • draw the figure in the air with the point of the finger
  • do it five times
  • Now switch to your right
  • Do it five times
  • Repeat the whole process three times.

Cross crawls

  • Stand
  • raise your left knee
  • gently pat it with your right hand
  • lower your left leg and right arm
  • raise your right leg
  • gently pat it with your left hand
  • lower your right leg and left arm
  • repeat the whole process for as long as you like
  • do it SLOWLY!!!

Hook ups

  • Stand or sit
  • cross the right leg over the left at the ankles
  • take your right wrist and cross it over the left wrist and link up the fingers so that the right wrist is on top
  • bend the elbows out and gently turn the fingers in towards the body until they rest on the sternum (breast bone) in the center of the chest
  • stay in this position
  • keep the ankles crossed and the wrists crossed and then breathe evenly in this position for a few minutes
  • you will be noticeably calmer after that time.

Some more tips!!!

1st tip:
Take a magazine and cut out a photo of the trendiest couple of the moment: Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. Divide it into two parts. I don’t know which side your preferences go to,
however... you have to stick the half of the photo you like best on the cover of your teacher’s register, of course not on the external face. Whenever your students start getting on your nerves (WHY? THEY ARE SOOOO SWEEET! ;-)) give them a new assignment and gaze at your favourite *half* while faking a sudden need to update the register.

2nd tip:
Have you got a meeting with your students’ parents to discuss their achievements/failures and troubled personalities? Don’t worry! Get a tape recorder and record your most memorable speech: “The boy/girl is very lively and sometimes restless but always well-mannered. He/she is very smart but doesn’t study enough. He/she should work harder to achieve the required competences”.
After all, it is just what you say to 99% of students’ parents!!! Turn your tape recorder on as the first parent comes in and let it speak for yourself while moving your lips silently. Then rewind the tape, wait for next parent and repeat the aforesaid process over and over again.

3rd tip:
Leave everything at school; I mean: tests, textbooks, registers, and, last but not the least
PROBLEMS!!!

I promise to come back soon in a few days with more exciting and effective tips on how to manage teaching burnout syndrome. While waiting for them enjoy yourself during your scanty free time! And always keep in mind this terrible truth:

your students will grow up and leave school and, after them, new teenagers will attend your classes and they will always be young while every school year you get a bit… more mature and full of sex appeal!!!

Love from your evergreen

Hazel

Read the sequel of "How to manage stress"!

What a handsome wizard!!!

back to homepage! Teachers' development